Dear NHW,

I hope you post my letter so that people can learn from my sister’s situation. 

My sister has been abandoned in a private hospital in Idi-araba after she gave birth and couldn’t foot the bills. She had a baby girl and they’ve been in the hospital for 7 months now. Her so called husband claims he can’t afford the bill and has left my poor widowed mother to continue from where he stopped. He only paid N30,000 out of the N155,000 that has been paid, remaining N70,000. 

Every time I see how my mum suffers to get money to offset her bills, the more I resent my sister. Instead of my sister to concentrate on her education, she got pregnant by this riffraff and had a set of twins, whom my mum is taking care of now. Thinking my sister should have common sense and stop, she got pregnant again by this idiot, now see where it has landed her.

I would have assisted but I just finished serving and I’m looking for a job desperately. 

I won’t lie, sometimes I’m tempted to do what other girls are doing to get money fast, just to help my mum. I hate the way she’s suffering.

Please, I need your advice what can I do? We need just N70,000 to offset the bills. I’m afraid my mum may die before all the bills are paid. It has caused her BP to rise. She has borrowed from her cooperative and from people. She applied for a soft loan at her work place, but she was denied that. 

*My dear, please, I won’t advice you to engage in any activity that will compromise your integrity. Keep praying and ask God to send a helper fast. He will answer your prayers. As for your brother inlaw, woe betide him! Some men are good at getting women pregnant and zero at living up to their responsibilities. You guys should make sure that before that her useless husband comes near her again, he must have a good job. Then, your sister should try and get some education as much as possible.*



Image credit: AwardsWatch

Dear NHW,

I’m so disgusted with my younger brother right now.

I am the oldest of 6 children and my younger brother is the second child but first son in the family. Our parents are aged and retired, leaving us to cater to the educational and financial needs of our last 3 siblings who are still in school.

While growing up, we’ve always joked but seriously, that we would not get married to poor people, so that we could take care of our parents. Besides, I think we children have suffered enough in the hands of poverty, so why should we marry poor people who will drag further into poverty and ultimately early death! This we agreed to do O!

Now, just few days ago, my brother introduced a very wretched girl, who hasn’t finished school, as his wife-to-be to us. After much investigation, I found out that this girl is the 1st of 8 children and they all live with their parents in a miserly 1 bedroom apartment. So you can imagine how many mouths she has to feed. I envision the amount of financial ‘load’ on my brother. We still have a lot to do in the house and now he wants to inherit somebody else’s problems.

Well, during the introduction, I kicked against the union. I didn’t hold anything back. I let the family of the girl know where I stand in the relationship. My stupid brother failed to see where I was coming from and just saw me as a “witch” and an enemy of progress. I don’t know if he’s girlfriend is pretending, but she didn’t utter any word throughout the fracas.

Please, what do you suggest I do about the situation because I am not myself at all?

*Dear blog reader, I feel you from the depth of my heart. Even me self, I hate poverty and its cohort with all my soul. Well, because we can only plan as human beings, God still has the final say, even if it doesn’t suit us. That’s the harsh reality of life. Rather than be confrontational about the whole thing, talk to both parties concerned about your fears and how they intend to alleviate those fears so that you can have peace of mind.

Because, saying that people should generally avoid poor people, or poor people do not deserve to be married, is not a fair thing to say. They didn’t beg to be born into a poor family.

So just pray my dear, for your brother and his relationship.


Lucky, Dupe and their baby

Photo credit: THE PUNCH

A police corporal, Lucky Ikharia, 34, who hails from Sabon Gida Ora, Edo State, had a quarrel with his wife, Dupe,  a 30-year-old indigene of Abeokuta, Ogun State, over N2,000, after which he reportedly sent her packing.

According to PUNCH Metro, the policeman, who is attached to the Makinde Police Division, Oshodi, Lagos had also ‘seized’ their only child from Dupe as a means of ‘punishing’ her. At about 8pm on the day of the attack, while Dupe was heading for her mother’s house in Mushin, unknown to her, Lucky was waiting in a bus to attack her. It was learnt that on getting to Olorunshogo junction, Lucky pursued his wife with the bus, crushing her legs in the process.Having left her for dead, Lucky went home where he allegedly stabbed his baby, David, to death, ripping out the toddler’s intestines. Still in a rage, the policeman turned the knife on himself in an attempt to take his own life.

In Dupe’s words…

“We got married and started living together around October 2013. We usually had quarrels and that was not the first time he would beat me up, and send me out of the house. But this incident started on Sunday, October 26. Lucky had initially kept N15,000 with me.

“Then, on Sunday, he collected N5, 000 to repair the bus. Later I gave him the rest, only to realise it was N8, 000. So, he began to question where I kept the remaining N2000. But I knew that it was his nature to stir up trouble because he had a habit of keeping money with me and going again to take it.

“So, we began to fight, and he asked me to leave the house. He did not allow me to take the child with me that day. I was sleeping in friends’ places until Thursday when I decided to go back home. I did not find my baby, and when I asked him, he threatened that if he met me in the house by evening, he would kill me, kill the baby and himself.”

*Is it me or can’t anybody see that the guy doesn’t look okay?!*