Please before you think anything, these are not my thoughts. I just thought I should share the information with people who need it. A lot of couples are busy blaming themselves for their lack of enjoying great sex. Now, before pointing that accusatory finger, make sure you are not involved in the following habits:

  1. Lack of enough sleep. You should have at least between 7 to 9 hours of sleep.
  2. Lack of exercise. Exercise provides you with capacity, stamina, strength and flexibility…which of course you will need between the sheets. Do at least 30minutes a day of exercise, even if it is brisk walking.
  3. Your bedroom is a mess! You can have great sex in the midst of clutter! You need to make your bedroom your haven.
  4. Lack of essential nutrients.Your body needs necessary nutrients to function optimally, especially vitamins and minerals. Eat foods rich in Vitamin B, such as chicken, fish, etc. Don’t just concentrate on getting only carbohydrate like rice, yam, eba…you know yourselves.
  5. Eating foods that increase gas in your tummy!…the end result being FART! If you are planning a romantic evening with your partner, then it’s best you stay away from beans or anything similar! For me, I might just add some oats to the list!
  6. Excessive consumption of alcohol. Too much alcohol causes the inability to orgasm.
  7. Quit smoking. Research has proven that smoking is strongly associated with ‘Erectile Dysfunction’.
  8. Check the medications you are on. Some drugs like antihypertensives, antihistamine, or antidepressants have being implicated as a cause of erectile dysfunction, vaginal dryness and low or no libido. Go see your doctor.
  9. Lack of wait for this… Masturbation!! Self-pleasuring, apparently is used as a form of therapy for sexual disorders. They say it helps awaken sexual desires.

So, now you have these information, it’s left for you to go try some or all of it out…the ball is now in your own court.


Picture credit: io9

Sex can be a major problem in marriage apart from money or affection. It’s great when both of you are on the same page when it comes to sexual matters but it’s horrible when one spouse can’t seem to get enough and the other is already tired after a round or may not even be interested in the first place.

Some major Libido killers may include the following:

  1. Lack of Communication between spouses – both parties always busy doing their own thing separately. The longer this occurs, the wider the gap of affection.
  2. Extreme exhaustion from stressful jobs or activities – especially a 7 – 10 job, or handling very active kids. *Tell me about it*
  3. Unresolved marital squabbles – there is no way someone’s sex drive will be high if he or she is aggrieved.
  4. An unfulfilled personal life.
  5. External ‘love interest’
  6. Not applying variety in one’s sex life – the missionary style being the commonest and the possibility of being the most boring.
  7. Prescription drugs – such as anti-depressants, anti-seizure/epileptic drugs,
  8. Surgery – to the genitals especially.
  9. Pregnancy and breast-feeding can also be a major problem.
  10. Negative body image – especially the change that comes with child-bearing.
  11. Menopause – ask your aged mother, she will tell you! Lol!

According to an article published on the ‘Sexpressionist‘, it was advised that either the couple live with the difference, get out of the relationship or find another partner while still maintaining the relationship – I feel that’s a totally unhealthy thing to proffer as a solution!

So what can be done about it you may ask?

  • Talk about ‘Sex’. A lot of couples shy away from this topic. Why?! Ain’t nothing to be shy about. Better still, make the conversation in the dark! Find out what turns him or her on.
  • Try and get to the bottom of the problem, don’t just push it aside like it doesn’t exist. It’s going to keep coming up like a ‘bad habit’.
  • If your spouse has health issues, help him or her deal with it or get some treatment.
  • You with a higher sex drive… need to be more understanding and patient.
  • Stop being malicious…resolve your marital problems. Ensure your spouse is on the same ‘happy’ page as you.
  • If your spouse is ashamed of her body, give her words of encouragement and lead her gently out of that dark place.
  • If after all these and more…see a SEX THERAPIST OR A DOCTOR

What I wouldn’t advise couples with mismatched sex drives to do.

  • Involve a third party who is not a professional!
  • Look for a sex partner outside your marriage. Believe it or not, it complicates the matter.
  • Self- medication. If you decide to use drugs prescribed by self, or what you read on the internet or what a friend advices you to do…you are so on your own!
  • Sit down and not do anything about it.

Image credit: Daily Mail



Photo credit: Core Motion Pilates

Believe it as it may, SEX is GOOD! :-)…as in really GOOD!

This article is particularly for all those ‘frigid’ wives in the house, who deny their husbands a healthy amount of sex!

According to WebMD, Sex allows you the following benefits:

  • Immune Booster. In other words, sex increases all the ‘soldiers’ of the body that help to fight against diseases.
  • Increases your libido.
  • Helps improve women’s bladder control by strengthening the pelvic floor muscles.
  • Helps lower blood pressure. (Before nko?! )
  • Counts as a form of exercise.
  • Lowers the possibility of having a heart attack.
  • Helps reduce pain in any part of your body. (Why won’t it…pleasure is used to replace the pain)
  • Reduces chances of prostate cancer from series of ejaculation. ( I am sure the men are excited about this!)
  • One is assured of a sound sleep.
  • Helps reduce stress drastically