Honestly speaking, I’m tired of people beating about this question! It’s not rocket science now…

A woman will cheat on a man who is:
– physically
– emotionally
– financially
unavailable! It could be for any or all of the above reasons. It just depends on what she feels is lacking in her relationship.

It’s only by the special grace of God that a woman may decide not to cheat. It’s not because she’s superhuman or because she’s afraid of  her  partner. Men, please just don’t get it twisted. Women are very committed beings but the minute they sense they are being taken for granted, they change course.

It’s easy for people to label some women as being bad or a cheater, but trust me every cheating woman has a history! That cheating was once a faithful wife. It’s just sad to note that the ‘good’ wife may also have a history … You just watch and see.

Cheating, as far as I’m concerned, originates from a gradual process of disconnection from a spouse, be it temporary or permanent disconnection… It’s still a disconnection!

Most women don’t plan to cheat on their partners, except for those who plan to do it out of revenge. Once that ‘disconnect’ earlier talked about, is there, then a ‘void of need’ is formed. That need is subjective, that is, the need may depend on what the woman considers lacking in her relationship.

In all honesty, there really shouldn’t be any excuse for cheating, but unfortunately, ‘cheating’ presents itself as an option…at the ‘right’ time, ‘right’ place and with the ‘right’ person. All because of what? All because the woman just wants to feel that ‘void of need’…without necessarily thinking about it.

But you know, it’s actually easy to prevent a woman from cheating…very easy. All the man needs to do is find out her ‘need’ or better still, her ‘love language’…and fill it…Voilá, she’s bound to that man for ever.

Trust Nigerian men particularly, they don’t understand any of these, and are not willing to. They just want to eat their cake and have it. They want to keep a ‘good’ wife at home who should be blind to all their rubbish… That’s submissiveness, the type they want, not so?

Just so you guys know, all it takes, is for that ‘good’ wife to stumble on the ‘right’ man… a conversation being the prelude. *cough* *cough* Then, you’ll be hearing things like, “Oh, I enjoyed your company. We should do this again… ” The only problem is that, it may not be ordinary conversation again…let your mind do the maths! Lol!

In my years of experience with all sorts of women…their needs are practically almost the same thing!

If you are a man in a relationship or a husband in a troubled marriage reading this stuff, it’s not too late to do a turn around.

And for all of you reading this stuff and wondering, “How does she know all these stuff? Has she cheated?”…all I can say is that you are missing the point and I suggest you start afresh and stay focused! *amebo* 😛



I’m sorry but this matter tire me… Abi, what else can one say?!

It still baffles me how some men pick up courage to ask certain girls out! Even the girl will be asking herself if it’s something she wore, or how she looks or maybe an ancestral curse?! I mean, for these caliber of men to have such a huge ‘liver’ to approach them, then it’s not ordinary eye…They no dey fear fear?!

That’s what happened to a friend and colleague of mine today at the office. Let’s just say a cleaner, who has been feeling like the best thing that ever happened to women since his employment into the organisation. We’ve been watching him feeling himself for some time, but we chose to ignore…we are used to his type. The most annoying thing about the whole thing is that this dude is married with kids. He suddenly felt it was time to sow his wild oats!…unfortunately, he entered one chance today! *Choi …even my Heavenly Father must have been upset!

Anyway to cut the long story short, he made an attempt to make a pass at this my colleague (who apparently is married with kids, but doesn’t look like she is). The idiot even had the guts to wink at her initially, which I hadn’t yet got over! After that wink, I simply beckoned on her to ignore the fool, but the guy made the mistake of moving closer to us!

Let me digress a bit, please…

Reviewing the case retrospectively, I wondered what could have brought about that insult. It’s not like my friend was even the friendly type, or she dressed ‘seductively’ to work? So how come he didn’t know where to draw the huge line? Could it be the frequent “Oh  Wole, good morning. How are you?” or “How was your weekend?!”…but he’s not the only one now!! Okayyyy….I think I know the cause of the problem…BIG, VERY BIG LIVER!

Back to the matter, anyway, he got the lashing of his life. The poor chap entered ‘one chance’, no be small. Oh my goodness, I thought I had a bad tongue, check my friend’s own out…she did not spare him. Goodness me, it was so easy to mess him up. He had all the characteristic feature of a guy you could ‘wash’:

  • ragamuffin
  • ugly dude
  • skinny…scrawny actually
  • underfed
  • no money (most importantly!)
  • bad dresser…with which money

I really felt like calling his wife to come save him! I had to intervene O! My friend was furious…

On a final note, I just want to appeal to some guys who are about to make the same mistake…please, try and dey look face, abeg! Levels dey now! Or else you might suffer worse fate!



I should have given my own 2 cents on the issue while it was sizzling hot, but you know me now, I prefer to talk about it when the fire is less… Makes me look at things more objectively I guess.

I first heard about Josh Duggar, when the gist of him molesting his sisters as a teenager. What made the gist ‘hot’ was the fact that his parents were pastors more or less…meaning he obviously grew up in a Christian family with strong values… Or so I thought.

And that’s the problem in growing up in an environment such as his…too much pressure to always be perfect, to never make mistakes, to see yourself as higher than others, especially spiritually.

The problem is that no matter what your opinion is, the fact remains that we live in an extremely sinful world. It’s a constant battle, especially for the so called ‘born-agains’ to fit in. I could have easily being among those who would naturally want to judge people negatively. But I learnt that, you cannot truly live in this sinful world without having records of failures… No way! If you have never had failures in your faith and in what you believe in, then I would advice you take several seats backward, shut your mouth and learn.

The sad thing about Josh’s situation is that he was too proud to accept he needed help in his faith, right from the onset. He kept lying to himself that he was strong enough to fight his battles… So, he set out in ‘pleasing’ others by putting up a picture of what they wanted him to be. He refused to acknowledge that he wasn’t perfect, but dealt with these ‘imperfections’ in secret… Pornography and the Ashley Madison website for people who wanted to cheat on their spouses.

Josh is a good man, a regular guy, who will constantly make mistakes and learn from it.

What am I trying to say in all these? I’m saying that people, human beings, the society should stop ‘idolising’ fellow human beings. You constantly put them under pressure to be the perfect being that you want them to be! It’s not fair… They are not God. God is the only one permitted to be perfect.

There was something I saw on my Facebook wall and thought I should share, because it’s so true.

Anyway, I just want to plead with you guys to stop being too hard on yourselves and try a make a personal change from every mistake we make. So rather than spend your time and energy judging other people, let’s spend the time we have on earth in righting our wrongs.

This also brings me to the issue of homosexuals that are constantly being judged. That you don’t like the idea is your personal opinion. I bet there are other aspects of your life, that believe me, God frowns at. I’ve always wondered if God will prepare his kingdom for unrepentant murderers and throw the homosexuals into the pits of hell? #justwondering

Any way, let’s just take something home… Quit judging others. It’s either you learn from their mistakes or shut up. Just because you’ve never being in their shoes doesn’t make you better or a saint.



Mrs X went on a private ‘date’ with her boss in a 7 star hotel. According to her, it’s supposed to be a harmless one, basically to discuss office stuff (okay O! If she insists). The meeting started off somewhat ‘officially’ in an open area in the hotel, then it moved to a private section…dunno for whatever reason. According to Mrs X, it was probably because they had had too much to drink. But for whatever reason, Mrs X and her boss started making out. And while this was going on, her eyes caught another couple on the opposite side making out. The man looked familiar…it was her husband. At that same moment, his eyes caught hers too!

*You can imagine what happened next*

Presently accusations are flying all over the place. None of them want to accept responsibility for their actions. Mr and Mrs X have refused to confront their actions and so are filing for a divorce.


  • What do you guys think?
  • Do you think their marriage can be salvaged and maybe patched up?
  • Is divorce the one and only solution?


Mr and Mrs X both have issues with themselves and their marriage, which they seriously need to face and deal with.

And No, I honestly don’t think divorce is the answer, not if they have irreconcilable differences.

They both need to get down to the root of their marital issues, if they still want to save their marriage…as in no more secrets.

Some times couples live reckless lives so as to get their partner’s attention, and maybe workout their issues or just get the divorce they’ve always wanted.

But all in all, I think they need to look beyond their imperfections and work out their differences in marriage.



I saw this article and I thought to share with you guys.

One woman’s seemingly normal life was flipped upside down when she made a shocking discovery while browsing on Facebook. She not only learned of his ongoing affair with another woman, but she also discovered something else — he’d recently gotten married.

The way she found the pictures is also quite astonishing because she actually didn’t have to look hard. He actually posted pictures of his other wedding on Facebook, reports the New York Daily News.

According to the Mirror, Liz and Adrian Linham had been married for seven years, and she was under the impression that everything was fine in their world. They didn’t have marital issues, so it seemed their life was quite peaceful and pleasant.

However, he had been living a double life for more than three of the seven years they’d been married. When he told her he’d be going out of town to work for weeks at a time, he was actually only going 16 miles away from their home to live with his mistress, Hayley. He’d reportedly been dating Hayley for years before he decided to tie the knot a second time. The Facebook pictures Liz discovered were actually from his second wedding ceremony, where he married Hayley on the same island where he honeymooned with her. However, that’s not all the pictures revealed.

Apparently, his best friend and best man in his first wedding also attended the unconventional ceremony and served as best man once again. Based on the pictures, it was quite obvious most of the woman’s family and friends in attendance were unaware that Adrian was already married. Needless to say, Liz was devastated and heartbroken. The disheartening news came as quite a surprise because it seemed their marriage was fine.

During a recent interview, she shared details about her husband’s deceit and how she confronted him. She also shared how his betrayal has altered her life.

“It was such a huge shock to me,” Liz Linham told Mirror. “I went on to Facebook and found the pictures pretty much straight away. I called him to confront him, but he yet again denied it. I just went into meltdown. It has completely altered the way I look at everyone. I look at people now, who I have known and trusted for years, and think, ‘Can I really trust you?’ I don’t think I can ever love again.”