Behind every successful man, is a prayerful and resilient wife

…ever heard of this saying? It’s actually a cliché which a lot of us never really pondered on. Hmmm…

If there’s nothing I’ve learnt in my 15 years plus of marriage, I’ve learnt that truly the minute a man and a woman have formed a union before God (called Marriage), the woman is automatically bestowed with an immense power to indirectly ‘rule’ her home but the man takes the glory.

In the early years of marriage, we are completely overwhelmed by all the problems that come with marriage : emotional, financial, social and spiritual (all these will be expantiated in future posts), that we completely forget to do one thing…PRAY!

We spend so much time thinking and rethinking all our challenges, so much so we allow the devil fill our minds with the fear of the unknown. During this trying period, this unspeakable fear may push us to think, say or do things that will push us further away from God. And still, we do not PRAY!

A lot of us want our husbands to be and do a lot of things…but it’s all in our heads and not from our hearts. Because if it was truly from our hearts, we would understand that it’s not by our power or might or our husbands’ power.

It is true that our husbands can say and do things that make us not want to pray for them. They can be inconsiderate, uncaring, abusive, even negligent. But we should not let all these bad attitude block our efforts in building a happy home. God has said in His Good Book that whatever we bind on earth will be bound in heaven and whatever we loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.

What we need to understand is that the devil doesn’t like union at all, especially one blessed by God! Get off your ‘shego’ (female ego) and submit all manner of bad behavior to God – alcoholism, laziness, bad temper, domestic abuse, infidelity, family negligence, etcetera etcetera.

I found out much later that marriage is not only for enjoyment ; some people start their marriages with trials and tribulations but later end in joy while some start the marriage with ‘over enjoyment’ but experience some turbulence along the journey. Sometimes our hurt and anger for our husbands does not allow our prayers work.

We are the only ones that have the power to release our husbands from whatever bondage they may be in, not even his mother’s prayer or his sister’s prayer is as powerful as ours. While we pray genuinely for our husbands, we also go through spiritual and emotional changes. Our heart becomes right, we start to unburden and become better wives.

Let us PRAY so that we start to reap the benefits. Let us form the habit of looking to God as the source of all we want to see in our in our husbands and in our marriages.

May God help us all in the bid to be happy in our marriages. Amen.


Please, please and please make me understand why a woman will remain in a house where she’s been battered physically, emotionally and mentally?!

Make me understand why you will tolerate an abusive relationship or marriage for so long!  *abi dem do you

Make me understand why you will choose not to expose a monster you call husband?

Make me understand why it doesn’t bother you that your kids watch as you are battered!

Make me understand why you won’t leave to fight a good fight or leave so that you can live to see your kids grow the way you wish for them to grow!

Make me understand why you choose not to fulfil your destiny as a mother, not just to your kids but to a nation that yearns for your motherly touch!

Make me understand why you think you will have no life without him… Is he your God?

Make me understand why you want to add to the general statistics of women who died from Domestic Violence

Make me understand why you choose to end your life this way

Even if you don’t want to live for your kids, at least for the sake of all those human hair you have acquired over time… Peruvian, Brazilian, Mongolian… Who will wear them?! That is, if you don’t value human life!

Ronke Shonde chose to stay with a monster, and what was the result? Death. Her husband murdered her in cold blood, he beat her to death, right in front of her kids (6 and 4 years). In 6 years, she could have left, but she chose to remain in that house.

Anyway, no point dwelling on what could have been. The point is how do we keep other women in domestic violence situations alive?

Please, women, let’s all stand against domestic violence . Abi, we should start helping them report without their permission ? #confused



I’m not trying to be judgmental here but this ‘Emeka Ike’  case is a typical example of what happens to any woman who is trying to have custody over her children, after a escaping a marriage filled with Domestic Violence.

See, I know for sure 2 wrongs don’t make a right and at the same time, no woman will just wake up one day and start accusing her husband of being physically violent or otherwise. In fact, most often t than not, Nigerian women like to protect their husbands, and even cover up their mess.

But it takes only a sensible woman to save herself from a domestic violence situation, no matter the cost. It is only a woman who is alive that can try to then get her children…but from a very safe distance.

Emeka Ike’s marital issues is something I’ve been trying so hard not to talk about. What saddens me is the way society frowns at a married woman who flees from her home, no matter the reason. See how long it’s taking the court in granting the woman’s request! If a wife says she’s not interested, then she’s not interested.

And I mean the role Emeka’s mom is playing in all these ongoing brouhaha, shouldn’t shock people. Every woman should not foolishly think that it is every mother inlaw that has their backs when the chips are down! Mba nunnu! Whether she likes it or not, you are still the outsider, therefore don’t expect that she will quarrel with her son over you! It’s a matter of “soldier come, soldier go”!

Emma, Emeka’s wife, said that the last she tried to speak with her kids, it was her mother inlaw who picked the call, and asked her to read Exodus 21!

Emma has moved out of the house for over 2 years now, in which no attempt has been made by her husband to reconcile. So naturally, the poor chic had to file for a divorce. Initially, Emeka’s counsel pleaded that the court give them 6months to allow for the possibility of a settlement. But Emma has cried that it’s too long, so the court shortened it to 2weeks. *Talk about a woman who knows what she wants*

I can imagine what she endured for 12 years! I’ve never been a fan of Emeka Ike sef! There was always something creepy about him, that tended towards violence, and this his wahala has just confirmed it. There a lot of actors that share the same spot like Emeka, that I seriously suspect may be violent to their wives – Emeka Enyiocha, Jim Iyke, ehm…these are the only 2 I can remember for now.

Anyway, I would love to use this medium to personally plead with women in Domestic Violence situations to please take a cue from Emma’s situation. It’s never too late to back out! Ignore what people may say to you, nothing else matters apart from your life! Save yourself first, then worry about other things later.

One more thing, if you’ve left the house completely, never agree for a meeting with your husband in the same house that you left…it may very well be the last time you will come out alive. So don’t make that mistake. If he wants to see you, then ensure the meeting is in a public place! #JustTakingPrecautions

Have an awesome day ahead.



Few minutes after their wedding

Lol! This is sheer madness…

29 year old Gavin Golightly, beat up his 22 year old bride on their wedding night, just because he couldn’t undo her dress, as in open the dress. The poor girl would have died in his hands if she hadn’t escaped to call a night porter.


Bride has filed for a divorce

The crazy groom was only charged with hours of community service (no wonder men keep getting away with domestic violence, when they will only be given a pat on their hands).


Crazy groom!

And to think they have a child together. Anyway, the wise chic has filed for divorce. She claims his ‘madness’ did not start that day. I love her, a woman after my heart that appreciates life, instead of dying in a man’s hand.

Those of you in abusive relationships, are you still thinking about it?!…*lips sealed*




According to PEOPLE,Shania Twain has released a video public service announcement speaking out against family violence.

“Sometimes home is where the hurt is,” says the singer in the video for the Royal Canadian Mounted Police’s YouTube channel. “It’s really confusing to be hurt by someone you love. Whether it’s physical, sexual or emotional – abuse is abuse. And it can happen in any family.”

Shania did the video as repayment for getting to ride into the Calgary Stampede on horseback wearing a full RCMP dress uniform to the delight of fans last July.

In the clip, the Canadian-born singer speaks as images of domestic abuse appear over her shoulder, “Violence, especially in your own home, is never acceptable,” Twain says, and urges viewers never to keep family violence a secret.

*I hope anyone reading this article and who is in an abusive situation has heard. In Nigeria, we are fond of keeping silent on issues that matter the most!*