BABY MAMA: BY CHOICE OR BY FORCE?

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Babes are not smiling anymore O! The rate at which single girls are hustling to have babies, has doubled over the past few years… My observation, forgive me!

You see, I sort of like this new ‘development’! I can’t really stand girls who aren’t realistic. You can’t keep waiting till your ovaries freeze, all in the name of waiting for ‘Prince Charming’ to come sweep you off your feet! Like seriously?!…in Nigeria? A Prince Charming?!

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Forgive me, but I’m not trying to encourage premarital sex (for the sake of those who are 40 year old virgins) or having babies out of wedlock. I’m just saying that if you really desire a family but you see that relationships have not been working out for you, then it’s time to consider other options before one enters menopause knowingly or unknowingly.

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But if we have to look at the flip side, a girl may decide that her purpose on earth far outweighs the possibility of ever having a family, meaning that she has decided to allow God’s will in her life…Hmmm, commendable.

What I find absolutely fascinating about this whole ‘baby mama’ drama, is the fact that, being one used to be by force, but now, it is fast becoming more by choice. A lot of reasons are behind this important decision:

1. The fear of menopause, is the beginning of wisdom.
2. The need to have someone to care for them in their old age.
3. For companionship.
4. A need for a heir to their accumulated wealth.
5. The mentality of “Men will come and go, but your child will never abandon you”.

So, my dears, if you are in such a predicament as to whether to become a baby mama by choice or by force, it’s still your ‘exam question’ to answer. After all, at the end of the day, you are still the one wearing the shoe and you alone know where it hurts you the most!

WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS STATEMENT MADE BY D’PRINCE

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First of all, I would love to congratulate Mavin’s D’Prince on the birth of his son by his baby mama.

Secondly, I’m not too comfortable with the statement he made on social media,
“There comes a time when a boy has to become a MAN. The love of my life just gave me a bouncing baby boy. To God be the glory. Now I feel my life has a purpose. To live for my boy.”

If you guys don’t see anything wrong with this statement, I see everything wrong with it! I smell rat! So is he saying that before he had the baby, his life had no purpose? Is he saying also that, his baby mama has no place in his heart, before the baby and after the baby?

These guys sef… Before they taste a girl’s ‘meow’, they speak in 7 languages until they taste it and woe betide any girl that gives it too soon, she’ll so take the back seat or no seat in his life!

Moral of this gist is that, girls should shine their eyes!

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“WHY I DUMPED MOTHERS OF MY 2 DAUGHTERS”- ORITSEFEMI

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Double Wahala crooner, Oritsefemi, revealed to Vanguard during the year that he had a rough beginning. But his rough beginning did not stop him from impregnating two childhood lovers who had a daughter each for him.

Until his interview with Vanguard no one really knew it wasn’t his present fiancee that had the daughters for him. Oritse explained extensively how the daughters came about and why he left their mothers at the time,

“My two daughters are from different mothers and I am not marrying any of them. It’s a long story. Back in the days, as a street boy, growing up in the ghetto city of Ajegunle, I had some childhood girlfriends who got pregnant.

“Then, I had no means of livelihood to sustain them. But I ensured that I took care of my kids right from when they were born. Unfortunately, I couldn’t take care of their mothers because of my financial status then. But now, that God has elevated me, I am planning to take my children abroad” he said.

Culled from VANGUARD

*well, all I know is that girls should be careful about whom they choose to love!*

DON’T TIE HIM DOWN WITH PREGNANCY!

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Image credit: Tumblr

Why do girls do that? I hate when I hear that a guy had to get married to a girl, not because he wanted to, but because she ‘hung’ her pregnancy on him. It’s a different case if he willing decides to make the relationship permanent because his girlfriend, whom he loves is pregnant…at least he loves her.

If the love you have for him not reciprocated, pregnant or not, no point tying the knots with him. How can you cope in a loveless marriage?! *Some chics dey try sha!*

The worst thing you can do to yourself, is to force a guy to marry you because of pregnancy!…that is plain ‘Bondage’. I doubt if that man will be able to love you. He will loathe you and may even decide on his own to make your life a living hell, by cheating shamelessly and unapologetically on you. Do you want that?…didn’t think so!

You won’t be the 1st baby mama to walk this earth, so why are you deliberately putting your hand inside hot water? Why?! Please my dear, save yourself some self respect!

Because you are pregnant and not married, doesn’t mean you can’t find someone who will love you and marry you in your state.

You are black (okay, maybe not all of you)and beautiful. Let your man love you enough to do the right thing. Trust me, you don’t want to raise your kid in a loveless marriage, that’s not fair.

“DON’T WAIT FOR MARRIAGE AFTER A CERTAIN AGE, JUST HAVE A BABY” – ELVINA IBRU ADVISES

Photo credit: Information Ng

Elvina Ibru, daughter of billionaire business man, Michael Ibru, on ‘Walk the Talk’ show on Channels TV, advised women who have reached a certain age not to wait for any man to marry them before considering having a child.

“Don’t wait for any man to marry you if you haven’t had a child. Go and have your baby. I chose my father’s child. When I met him, after a few months I said yes, this is the one that would give me what I need. If anything happens to me, I know that my child would not suffer. This one na better person”.
Asked if her baby daddy is still with her, Elvina said “He is not with me anymore. We have been separated for four years now”.
Asked why he left, she laughed and said “He is a man”. Elvina said she’s never really been interested in marriage and doubts she will ever be. Who agrees with her?
*As much as I hate to be an advocate of pre-marital sex and baby mama dramas, I have to agree with her to an extent. Let’s be real a bit, age is not on your side, your biological clock ticking away, men not falling genuinely in love with you except for your money…c’mmon, do the ‘right’ thing! I like the idea of choosing well, at least your baby’s future will be secured sef!*