HOW CAN A GUY BE SO FINE, YET SO DUMB!

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Uzor finally introduced her cousin to me. The cousin she had been going on and on about, how fine and cool he was and all.

Andy was his name. An Abuja- based big boy. I was skeptical about the fact that at his age,43 years, he hadn’t settled down. If truth be told, he was a sight to behold. The type of guy you read about in ‘Mills and Boons’. We agreed to meet at an eatery close by my house. I really wasn’t in the mood to go out with anybody or even date. I also needed to be sure that he was ‘The One’, so that I don’t waste my energy chasing shadows!

He was a bit late, about 5 minutes late (a mark down as far as I am concerned). Not too sure if I smelt a whiff…maybe not. You can’t blame me for thinking so, since he came in sweaty!

He chose to sit facing me, which was quite uncomfortable. At first the conversation started off with ease, getting to know each other. Then, when all the introductions were done and gist wasn’t flowing like I expected, I tried bringing up topics on politics, Chibok girls and the upcoming elections…I’m sorry to say, I was not in the least impressed. I tried to make it better, so I moved to entertainment, Chris Brown and his numerous failed relationships. I even went as far as the Kris Jenner issue…Andy still had nothing to offer!

Hian! What did Uzor ‘drop’ for me? Relationship is not by force…really. I would rather hug myself than marry a Dundee United!

Apparently, Andy was only interested in telling me about his escapades with women, as well as some of his business deals that went wrong! *Frankly, not INTERESTED*

While he was bantering away, I started seeing clearly why he wasn’t settled. Girls like me are sharp…we know what we want.

PLEASE GUYS, FOR THE RECORD, IF YOU MUST HAVE ME, HAVE SOME BRAINS!!

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