I know a lot of couples who have been in a situation in which when they can’t connect with their spouse, they lean on certain people for emotional comfort. This kind of situation occurs mostly when couples quarrel and a spouse starts to share intimate information with someone of the opposite sex outside of the marriage…and then before that spouse knows it, she hangs on to the relationship because of the emotional gains.
I’m talking about EMOTIONAL INFIDELITY. Most marriages are being threatened today by this ‘ill’. Some marriages have actually broken up because of this.
The question now is “How does one know when one is crossing that line of Infidelity?”
Well, you could be crossing that line if you do any of the following:
1. You dress to impress that other person, even if it means using your last cash to do that expensive hair, buy that shirt or dress, even shoes, just to get a compliment from him or her. *cough* …some men I know are guilty of this!
2. You give him or her a special smile that you have never given your spouse.
3. You spend more time on your phone or pad or blackberry chatting, than you would with your spouse.
4. You could check your phone a thousand times for messages from ‘you know who’ !
5. You laugh more with this person. You even share more intimate gist with this person…in short, you prefer this person to your spouse. *Is it fair? Judge yourself O*
6. At every given time, you are comparing this person with your spouse. Thoughts of your spouse sort of makes you upset while thoughts of this person, puts a wide smile on your face.
7. You get excited because you can’t wait to see or talk to this person. You feel this person understands you better. *Na so!*
8. You go out of your way to defend your relationship with this person especially when outsiders notice the suspicious closeness. Your reply usually is, “No O, we are just friends!”
9. You find it hard to concentrate in anything. Nothing matters anymore, not even staying at home or your personal life.
10. You tell more and more lies just to be with that person or talk to him or her. You become so secretive and do everything possible to cover your ‘mess’.
11. The worst is fantasizing about a possible sexual relationship with the person. You might even be planning to spend time together with this person.
12. Receiving intimate gifts from the person and lying about it’s origin from your spouse. Lol!
So, in case you didn’t know…Emotional infidelity is the new type of adultery, where there is no sex, but a lot of heart to heart things!!
If you are involved, reconsider…it may just cause more harm than good in your marriage.
Did this help?…I hope it did for you, who is confused about the budding relationship in your life.