Photo credit: InformationNg

Peeps, I just got a mail from one of you guys and she desperately needs your advice.


I am an avid reader of your blog and I need some advice, although, my issue does not have as much drama and suspense as the ones you post!

I am a single lady in my mid 30s, I have spent most of my life in Lagos. I had all my primary, secondary and tertiary education here as well. In short, I am a Lagos girl. Presently, I reside in the Northern part of Nigeria and have been for 4 years now since my transfer from Lagos.

The place I reside is more or less a ‘glorified village’ and a great big challenge for me to settle down in, I only get to see only Mallams. To make matters worse, no social life here, no place to even ‘play’ or relax…it is that bad.

I know you may ask,”why can’t she resign?” I can’t because my job is a Federal one with a pretty good pay, not to mention the job security that comes with it and other perks. As age is not on my side, my fear is that there is also no guarantee of finding my ‘husband’ and I really do not want to be reminded about my ‘singlehood’ by my married friends. Besides, all my efforts to get a transfer has been in vain, due to the pressure from my aged parents for me to resign or get a transfer back to Lagos, where there is at least a flicker of hope.

The funny thing is that even though I am entitled to a 4 week leave, is that enough to start a relationship?

My confusion is this: Should I resign to pursue my dream of getting married or stay on the job?

*My dear, if truth be told…only you can really answer this question because you are the only one who knows which is more important, staying on the job or getting married? I think you should pray more for God’s direction to show you where your husband is, whether in Lagos or in the north with any of those Mallams. LOL! For all you know, maybe your ‘husband’ is in the North! Like seriously.

Being in your mid 30s does not make you a ‘spring chicken’ so I understand your throes and woes. You don’t necessarily have to go to a club or party to find your husband! No, not at all!  Your ‘husband’ can come from anywhere. He may even be in the same office as you are. Pray sha.


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