JUST FOR LAUGHS! (ADULTS ONLY ZONE)

According to Women’s Health Magazine,

Sex is amazing, don’t get us wrong. But with all the great things that come with it, there’s a whole boatload of stuff that can make us cringe, too.

If you’re scratching your head and wondering, “Whatever could she be talking about?” then you can put your hand back in your pocket, because I’m going to fill in the blanks for you. Get ready for your “Aha!” moment.

1. Morning Breath
Morning sex is so awesome! But morning breath, even the most bearable of morning breath is still not nice. Brushing your teeth beforehand is nice, though!



2. Leg Cramp
Well, it was just a matter of time before it was going to happen, because no one can keep their legs like that forever.

3. Farting
Yep, it happens to the best of us. It just does.

4. Having To Pee
Maybe you should have gone before, but you got distracted by the chance to have sex right then and there, so now you’ve got to go NOW.



5. Bloody Sheets
You thought your period was over? But it’s not, it wasn’t, and now you have that ugly brown streak that looks like anything but blood on your sheets.

6. The “O” Face
Does anyone make a pretty face when they have an orgasm? This is a serious question.


7. 69
It’s great in theory, but when it comes down to it, it’s just an awkward position that makes not just breathing (if he’s on top) difficult, but the enjoyable factor zero, especially if there’s a huge height difference.

8. Dryness
For women, this is our version of a penis that refuses to get erect. Our wetness usually determines how turned on we are, and when things are all dried up, not only can it give our partner insecurities, but it makes for VERY painful penetration. This is one of the nasty side effects of being drunk or hungover.

9. “No, I Didn’t Orgasm”
Well, then. This is pretty awkward. Totally normal, but awkward.

10. Dirty Talk
While there may be no time like the present, it’s not true for dirty talk. Sometimes it just fails miserably.

11. Complaints From Your Roommate Or Neighbor
You’re having a hot and heavy time, then you either get a knock on the wall or a passive aggressive text from someone in the vicinity: “Can you keep it down please?” Mood. Killed. 

12. Failed Positions
You really should have known your balance wasn’t that good, and that it would result with you both on the floor, and one of you with a nosebleed.

13. Pubic Hair

Whether you love them or hate them, or have chosen to wax them all away, everyone seems to have a preference, and I think we can all agree that it’s just not necessarily pretty. Get one stuck in your throat and, well, expect it to be there for days.

14. The Bra Struggle
Although it’s assumed that most men can undo a bra in less than 10 seconds by the time they’re out of college, that’s not always the case. Especially if that bra clips in the front—dudes just don’t get how that can be a possibility.

15. Sweat
Totally natural, but sometimes you just don’t want to be slippin’ and slidin’ on your partner. In addition to being unsexy, it can be downright dangerous!

16. The Waiting Game
You know when you’ve already climaxed and now you have to wait for your partner to get there, too? It’s not that you don’t care. It’s just that you’re ready for a nap.


17. The Weird Smell
Bodily fluids and sweat do make for one hell of an, um, interesting scent.

18. The Wet Spot
 
You know exactly what I’m talking about. Exactly.

19. “I’m Coming! I’m Coming!”

Yeah, I get it, but you’ve been saying that for almost 25 minutes now. Just come already, and quit announcing it as if you want some sort of medal!



Well, like I said…it’s just for laughs.

3 thoughts on “JUST FOR LAUGHS! (ADULTS ONLY ZONE)

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