Diary of a Nigerian Woman

What came after wasn't easy. People talk about "choosing yourself" as if it's simple. Like waking up one day, deciding to leave, and everything falling into place. They don't tell you about the guilt. The voices in your head that sound like your mother, your pastor, your aunties: "You didn't try hard enough. Marriage is work. You're giving up too easily. What will people say?" They don't tell you about the loneliness. How quiet your house becomes when you're no longer perform

I was the perfect wife. At least, that's what I told myself every morning as I woke up at 5 a.m. to prepare his breakfast before he left for work. That's what I believed when I smiled through another family gathering where his mother critiqued my jollof rice seasoning. That's what I clung to when I swallowed my own dreams to make room for his. I had the checklist, you see. The one every Nigerian girl gets handed at some point - by her mother, her aunties, the women at church,